Monday, October 11, 2010

No Really, I love Mondays!


A guest post on Owning Pink

I recently came across this post on the blog, Working Moms Against Guilt, and it spoke to me. I too, look forward to Mondays. Sunday blues? Not me! I rejoice on Sunday night -- not because I am that excited to go to work, but because nothing I do during the week is ever as hard as being home with my children.
I love my children. 
They are the biggest source of joy in my life and they make me feel complete. But…hands down, being a mom is the hardest thing I do, period. I love Mondays because it is a “break” for me. I get to drive to work in the car by myself. I don’t have to break up fights, reach for spilling juices or take unexpected potty breaks -- I just drive. I get to have my own identity all day as Heather, not Mom. I don’t have to count, re-direct and brace myself for every transition -- I just do it.  I even eat lunch while sitting down -- tasting the food, chewing and swallowing.
I could never be a stay-at-home mom. Not because I don’t value what they do -- on the contrary, I think what they do is way too hard. I wanted to be a stay-at-home mom. I wanted to enjoy it, but I didn’t. After my second child was born I stayed at home for almost a year -- it didn’t work so well. I was never so tired, negative, short-tempered, and frustrated in my life. I regret to say that I watched the clock most days, feeling like bedtime couldn't come soon enough. I was not fully present, because I was completely depleted. I felt like it was all I could do to maintain each day. Mothers of young children who stay at home have the most difficult job in the world. Many do it, and love it. Many do it and don’t love it. Many wish they could stay home, but can’t. 
Present and balanced
After I got past the guilt, and admitted that I didn’t enjoy staying home full time with my children, I was instantly happier. I went back to work part-time. I need this balance of productivity, recognition and separate identity in my life. I am a better mom for it. Now when I am with my kids, I am attentive, patient and calm. I look forward to coming home to my kids after a day of work. They have 110% of my attention in the evening. I am excited to see Friday come so I can soak them up all weekend -- but I am always ready to see Monday come!
Are you a stay-at-home mom? Do you work from home, or do you work outside the home? How does your work-home-children arrangement feel to you? How do you view Mondays, Fridays…any days with your child?
In support of ALL MOTHERS,
Heather Sobieralski
Life Coach for Moms

2 comments:

  1. I'm a full-time mom, who wishes she could be a part-time mom. Working part-time would be the "best of both worlds" for me. I would have equal time working and equal time with my toddler. But the economy, our mortgage and healthcare will not allow it for us.

    I dread Mondays b/c my weekend and time spent with my little one are now over. And my working mind/home mind needs to be in top gear to get through the week. I love Fridays because of the quality time ahead of us and I can shut down my working mind and just focus on the home mind. I feel like my mind NEVER stops to completely rest!!

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  2. Hi Nancy,
    It is like you have two different brains functioning for each of your different worlds (Nancy the worker and Nancy the mom). Wouldn't it be great if you could blend the two into one well rested and relaxed mind?

    Cheers to your Fridays!

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